Saffron's Space

 

We’ve all thought it; what would I do if the zombie apocalypse happened right now. There are memes flooding social media; e.g. what would your weapon be if you only had time to grab one thing from your desk? The world has definitely fallen into another zombie craze, with Walking Dead and World War Z being just two examples.

Walking DeadBut I want to get serious people. I’ve spent a long time thinking about this (way too long really) and here are 5 steps you can take to survive the zombie apocalypse.

Now I’m going to make a proviso here; while these strategies might help in any old zombie apocalypse they are tailored to a specific type of zombie; the fast-moving, rabid, but not overly intelligent zombie. Think the speed of World War Z zombies with the intelligence of Walking Dead zombies.

Ok, let’s get started, you may want to take notes if you plan on surviving the coming apocalypse:

 

1. Decide on a primary safe-house.

This should be a secure location preferably away from population centers. You should know exactly how you plan on getting there, remembering that roads may be blocked.

 

World War Z2. Supplies.

Where will you get the necessary supplies for the coming apocalypse? Food, fuel, weapons. Is there an army-store near your secure location? A shopping center? A fuel station? Eye them off now, in a zombie outbreak there’s no time to torment yourself with the ethics of stealing fuel from dead people.

 

3. Don’t wonder off alone.

We’ve all seen it. Who wanted to kill Carl (Walking Dead) when he wondered off into the forest on his own? Well then don’t do it! I don’t care if you’ve had an argument with your group, or if you hear a strange noise in the darkness- DON’T GO WONDERING OFF.

 

4. Learn to hunt and survive in the wild.

So, zombies come from people. Therefore there are going to be more zombies where there are more people. So, logic would suggest the best survival method is to go into the middle of the wilderness or desert and wait for all the zombies to starve. Who knows how long that will take??? So, you have to be able to live without provisions in the middle of no-where. I’d start practicing now if I were you.

Warm Bodies

5. Don’t fall in love with a zombie.

Please, please, please, don’t believe what you saw in Warm Bodies, it was all lies. Zombies will not grow feelings and want to protect you- they want to eat you. So, don’t under any circumstances try to save, protect, befriend or fall in love with a zombie!

 

I hope you find these tips useful in the zombie apocalypse! Personally I’ll be getting on a boat and sailing out to the middle of the ocean, maybe find a nice deserted island, and spend the rest of my days fishing in the sunshine. (I’m operating on the premise that zombies can’t swim).

And if you like zombies, be sure to check out the short story by Michael Cairns, it’s a fantastic read.

Did I miss anything? What would you do in a zombie apocalypse? What’s your safe-house like?

 



5 Comments so far

  1.    Aidan Stone on October 12, 2013 10:17 pm      Reply

    You forgot rule number 2: Double tap
    Never turn your back until you have doubletapped them sukas!

    •    saffron on October 12, 2013 10:37 pm      Reply

      Oh my goodness you’re right! How could I forget the double tap!! haha thank you- you may have saved millions of lives 😛

  2.    ramona on October 12, 2013 10:48 pm      Reply

    What about practicing defense skills, or a silent weapon such as archery?

    •    saffron on October 12, 2013 10:53 pm      Reply

      Definitely, archery is a good one and I also think knife skills are a good thing to have. So you can go all ninja… oo oo.. swords definitely!

  3.    ramona on October 12, 2013 10:58 pm      Reply

    oooh ninja style with a sword. I like that!
    They should have zombie defense classes, it would be so much fun!

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